If uncertainty could kill, I'd most probably be dead. I feel like in my head, I've chosen what is sensible and what makes the most sense. But then why do I wonder if I'm making a mistake. I'm just so scared of making mistakes, because some you can't undo. Then what happens? I find myself being surprised at things that shouldn't surprise me anymore. I second-guess almost everything. I'm surprised that I find myself kind of disappointed to be leaving work so soon. I've sort of built a comfort zone there. And leaving means setting a deadline for making decisions. I am not a decision maker. I don't know what I've built up in my head to be true and false, but I'm pretty sure I'm wrong. I mean, I don't have to be one hundred percent sure all the time, I suppose. Everyone has doubts, or so I like to think. Which isn't to say that no one can ever be sure, but I don't see the price of certainty worth it. Despite this internal debate I run in my head everyday, I already know where my mind and heart will linger. And I know how my life will continue. I just need to assure myself that that's how I'll be happiest.
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