I don't know why I won't allow myself to be okay with this. I think it's pretty obvious that I'd be way better off without you. It's pretty easy to see that you have done way more harm than good. Then why is it so hard to sever all ties? Why do I search for things to tell you. She was right when she said that you're not even a person anymore, you've sort of become a figment of my imagination. But more so in a way that I've built you up as a completely different person than you probably are.
I am really not ready for this long weekend. A long weekend at home means facing a lot of things that I don't think I have patience for. Not to mention I don't get anything done at home, ever. I can't just take 4 days out of my life to not do anything. I have so much to accomplish by the end of the month.
I am scared to death of the next couple of weeks.
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